Think about what factors are influencing the problem, such as scheduling, personality conflicts, feeling overworked, or disrupting some kind of perceived pecking order. Look at not only your side, but the other side as well. Looking at both sides can help you understand the problem from both perspectives. [3] X Research source

It’s easy to feel personally attacked for something, especially if it’s regarding your work. Do your best to not take things personally and keep everything within the lens of your work.

Don’t wait for the person to come to you. Be the first one to bring up the problem, no matter what your role is. Sometimes a conflict can arise over a personal failure. Even so, handling failure at work with honesty and integrity can do much to prevent even worse conflicts from emerging.

Decide whether you want to send an email or have an in-person discussion. If you speak in-person, do so away from other employees and when both of you have time to talk.

“Say, I was wondering why you brushed off my question yesterday,” or “I’ve noticed that you cut my work down, and I’m wondering why that is. ”

Don’t take up the whole interaction with your side. Be willing to hear them out. You may gain more information or understand them better. Check to see if they’re done speaking. Say, “Is there anything else you want to add or say to me?”

For example, if you feel bullied, both of you might agree that you have problems getting along or splitting responsibilities. Say, “I want us to resolve this. Let’s find some things we can agree upon so that we can move forward. ”

For example, say, “I’m sorry I said those hurtful things. I was upset, but it wasn’t right of me to call you that. ”

Immediately responding will likely mean you respond in a negative way.

If you want to express how you feel wronged or hurt, use “I” statements. For example, say, “I felt really hurt when you took credit for the project during the meeting,” instead of, “I can’t believe you did that. You’re a horrible person. ”[11] X Research source

Your HR department can send someone to mediate or get you and the other person talking more constructively. A good mediator will help the disputants find their own solution, not provide advice or push them toward any particular solution.

If you can’t create a plan on your own, involve your manager or HR in creating ways to approach conflicts. For example, if the person talks over you in meetings, say, “I want to be heard. Is it possible for you to wait until I finish speaking to chime in? If you start to talk over me, I will ask you to let me finish. ”

For example, if you struggle to have balance in projects, divvy up tasks before starting the project so that they feel fair and equal. Have someone neutral step in and get their opinion on the tasks.